Are you the strong one: my habits (part 4)
As we wrap up the #digdeeper series and this month's topic on #thestrongone, we turn our attention to how we practically live authentically and intentionally in true strength.
*Boundaries.* Although you'd think it is naturally occuring for us to have them, for many this is not the case. At least not healthy ones. For those who identify as strong ones, it is not uncommon for boundaries to either be too loose, that is, you are available and accessible for everyone, all the time. Or on the flip side, those boundaries are so rigid, you have walled yourself off from everyone, under every circumstance. It is possible for both to exist as well, as you can be so closed off to others knowing you intimately, but still be that person who shows up and is present to support everyone. #exhausting
There are healthier alternatives, of course and this is my recommendation for your consideration this week.
These are just some questions to consider as you proactively evaluate the way you have been doing life so far.
Who will have access to you?
Under what circumstances?
How much of you will they have access to?
Another aspect of #boundaries is how much of yourself you give to others. Are you overextending in ways that is fostering #codependency in your relationships rather than #interdependent relationships?
The final point, boundaries should be fluid. This means that you can (and should) adjust and readjust as necessary. I'm not a proponent of #cutoffculture, but I do firmly believe that each of us are within our human rights to move people in and out our proverbial #circleoftrust as is appropriate for our own mental and emotional health. #drgiasays #digdeeper #cyclebreaker #truestrength #renouncingshame #intentionalliving #Jesusplustherapy #Christiantherapists #secureidentity #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthishealthtoo
#cyclebreakers #lifeaftertrauma #iamthestrongone #bahamianauthor #caribbeanauthor #mentalhealthadvocate #mentalhealthprofessional
Are you the strong one: my declarations (part 3)
One of my favorite lines...
Being strong is overrated.
Another of my favorite lines...
It is okay, to not be okay sometimes.
As it is #mentalhealthawarenessmonth lemme just say, if you are not feeling okay for most of the time, please know that while this is human, it should not be your norm and I would highly recommend checking in with a medical doctor and/or a therapist.
As we move towards a shift in thinking in language, be sure to challenge yourself. Be intentional about affirming your own value. No conditions. Just because.
Say it with me.
I am enough.
I am human.
I am completely loved, unconditionally.
Lean into your “weak” moments and own them. They are not defining you even if it feels like it’s been the story of your life. Put another way, your imperfections, struggles and challenges do not mean that you are weak, broken or less than.
Let’s seek to
* Normalize interdependence, that is needing others or needing help outside of ourselves
* Normalize having limits, which means you can’t be all things to everyone, all the time.
* Normalize having and showing emotions. Pain cues you that something is wrong. Acknowledge it, identify the source and then make steps to address the source. While that’s happening, it’s okay to admit that you may not be okay.
Now really, how are you doing? #drgiasays #digdeeper #cyclebreaker #truestrength #renouncingshame #intentionalliving #Jesusplustherapy #Christiantherapists #secureidentity #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthishealthtoo
#cyclebreakers #lifeaftertrauma #iamthestrongone #bahamianauthor #caribbeanauthor #mentalhealthadvocate #mentalhealthprofessional #podcastersofcolor #Bahamianpodcasters #Caribbeanpodcasters #podcasters #podcastersofinstagram #podcasting #blackpodcast #christianpodcast
Are you the strong one: my self talk (part 2)
There's no way to sugar coat it... at the heart of #thestrongone is trust issues.
Whether you can admit it or not, your self talk probably all boils down to some version of...
people can't be trusted.
For some of us,
*we can't trust others to help themselves
*we can't trust others for simple tasks (for themselves or for us)
*we can't trust others for deep or complex tasks (for themselves or for us)
*we can't trust them with our heart, vision or dreams (to share with)
*we can't trust someone else to support us in our vision or dreams
ultimately, we can't trust being seen and/or known and/or we are fearful of being let down or rejected.
I know, you may be saying, that's not me. I just like being helpful. Well...if your helping overextends the point where you "end" and the other person begins, ie you are trying to do FOR them, what only they have control over...then, you don't trust them with their own journey.
So this week...as it relates to your relationships and how you connect. It is time for self check.
Are you that person who trusts no one, ever for anything? If the answer is yes, maybe and probably... 😅then you are a strong one and my next question is why?
*Have you been hurt (past relationship)?
*Have you experienced some other trauma?
*Are you afraid of being rejected?
You will want to take these responses and explore more deeply with a professional.
Are you the strong one: my beliefs (part 1)
Weakness vs strength. Being perceived as weak usually equates with brokenness, something being wrong. As such, most of our curated lives are from the place of managing ourselves and organizing our worlds so we always appear...strong. In Control.
But if we are honest with ourselves, the amount of energy required to maintain this appearance of having it all together, of being "strong", of not showing emotions or anything related to emotions is exhausting. Can we just shed the baggage and be ourselves?
That's the crux of my work around #thestrongone. As we consider our inner lives, I would challenge you to consider if any of the above is true for you. Do you feel you are strong when you are NOT feeling?
It is human to feel.
It is human to have moments of brokenness.
It is human to be "weak".
And if we are honest, it takes great strength to admit that you are scared. To admit that you are not okay. To own the places of insecurities.
This month we dig deeper in how we define ourselves based on these misconceptions of strength. #drgiasays #digdeeper #cyclebreaker #truestrength #renouncingshame #intentionalliving #Jesusplustherapy #Christiantherapists #secureidentity #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthishealthtoo
#cyclebreakers #lifeaftertrauma #iamthestrongone #bahamianauthor #caribbeanauthor #mentalhealthadvocate #mentalhealthprofessional #podcastersofcolor #Bahamianpodcasters #Caribbeanpodcasters #podcasters #podcastersofinstagram #podcasting #blackpodcast #christianpodcast
Spiritual Growth: my habits (part 4)
This week is a little different from week 4 in previous months. Instead of looking specifically at habits and how we can build upon and/or replace, I want you to consider the motives of your spiritual habits (and goals).
What is it that you already do...that align with your spiritual goals? are you doing them because of obligation or fear? or are you motivated by love and relationship? I know this may sound a bit much but the reality is that we are less likely to attain our deeper spiritual goals if we are motivated by fear, or even obligation.
There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.-1 John 4:18
John tells us that there is no love in fear because perfect love drives it out. Given we are completely and fully loved... that is, the love toward us is perfect, we are then free to live. This living includes us making decisions about what we do, with whom, and when or how often. We do not have to fear punishment, nor do we have to live motivated by the fear of disappointing God or another person. Put another way...our goals should be motivated by our values, passions and convictions and not by "shoulds", obligations or fear (punishment, disappointment
As we wrap up this month where we consider how to break cycles and attain our spiritual goals, consider the underlying factors that motivate your goals. If you realize that some of it is pure obligation or from a place of fear, then reassess whether or not these goals are ones that align with your renewed sense of self...that is being loved without conditions. If the goals still align, then incorporate those affirmations from last week as words to motivate your goal attainment. If you find that the goals no longer align, then pray about new goals. #drgiasays #Jesusplustherapy #Christiantherapist #Christianity #spiritualhealth #calvary #iamthestrongone #secureidentity #faith #goalsetting
Spiritual Growth: my declarations (part 3)
If anything from the previous weeks have resonated with you...that is you may have a faulty view of how God sees you, this week is definitely for you.
Grab your journal because I've got some scriptures for you to base your affirmations upon.
The affirmation for you...
I am completely loved.
Why is that important? Well, if that sinks in deep...deep into your consciousness and you fully believe it, then you'd likely see yourself more naturally "grow spiritually". This is because you'd be free from the need to do things hoping to earn brownie points and your responses will be based on the growing relationships with your loving Father.
There is a certain freedom in the security of being loved and just "being". If I'm honest, I do believe that is the secret to spiritual health = surrendered heart that is confident in being loved.
Jeremiah 29:11
Jeremiah 31:3
Jeremiah 1:5
Psalm 139:15-16
John 3:16
John 10:36
Romans 5:8
Ephesians 2:8
1 John 3:16
#drgiasays #Jesusplustherapy #Christiantherapist #Christianity #spiritualhealth #calvary #iamthestrongone #secureidentity #faith